Winding down hours last Friday, I was thankful to have my head down coding after days of analysis. I noticed Chris, the senior-most infrastructure guy, lurking around suspiciously long on Nick’s (the dev team leader who sits diagonally behind me) empty desk. I briefly considered challenging him but was having way too much fun coding my way to the first (jubilatory) end to end working call of a service I was working on.
A while later, my euphoria was cut short by Nick’s growl: “Who’s been messing with my desk, I can’t move my $%@*%£# mouse?” Turns out the mouse had been very firmly glued to the desk by the aforementioned Chris. Cue general hilarity while Nick and others, including me, tried to move the mouse. The mouse was firm in its Corbyn/Trump-esque refusal to yield to increasing amount of force. After a frustrating amount of time (& swearing), Nick bit the bullet and employed a careful but firm kick (yes, believe it: it was an actual boot to the mouse kick) to get it unstuck.
So far so good; comments ranged the usual spectrum and threats of retribution abound. Picking up about Chris’ dog, I proffered a waking-up-with-dog’s-head solution, which was met with the standard hilarity: till the Perspective Man stepped in.
A word about Andy: a proficient & extremely helpful senior developer, he also has deep pockets of knowledge of a wide range of non software related subject. I’m talking about a level/range from sub-atomic forces to effect of types of soils on growing orchids. Yup: it’s about areas no-one knows they (definitely) don’t care about till they hear about them. That hasn’t stopped him from providing out-of-the-blue perspectives on situations leaving gobsmacked listeners in his wake.
So the situation: retaliation against a guy, a dog and maybe a horse thrown in metaphorically.
Andy’s take: “You know, there’s not much meat in a dog’s head. With a horse’s head I could feed my family for a week probably.”
That brought the house down. The earlier raucousness, dying down to the end of the working week gentle hubbub, was re-energised. So the horse’s dead, and they may be coming after you next but the family food is sorted for the week – overall a mixed day! How’s that for a fresh perspective?
As is usual, the Prospective Man was not finished – providing us with something not featured in Jamie’s kitchen: